I quietly create handmade 1840s calotype paper negatives in my studio as part of my healing, and I write about grief, fear, and endurance so people who are hurting feel less alone.
Pictorial Whispers is my ongoing body of work made with 1840s calotypes. It is a slow, hand-made record of grief, healing, and the quiet days in between.
Each handmade calotype begins at a single vintage window in my outdoor studio in the Ozarks.
I place a flower or leaf in a simple vase on the windowsill, work through my emotions for that day, and build a still life that matches that feeling.
The result is part personal journal, part 19th-century photographic experiment, and part invitation for you to sit with your own memories.
Window Studies – A Grief Journal in Light
I lost my youngest daughter, and nothing in life has been the same since. This work is how I stay present with that loss without turning away from it. These calotypes are not illustrations of a theory. They are the days themselves.
- Every calotype is made at the same old window, using only natural light.
- The window becomes a portal into my inner life and emotions.
- As the light and view shift, they echo my own inner weather: denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance.
- Flowers, vase color and shape, curtains, and the tone of the window light all serve as simple metaphors for each stage of grief.
2026 Pictorial Whispers Volume
Visit the Pictorial Whispers online gallery and step into the quiet world of handmade calotypes—made slowly, by hand, at one old Ozarks window.
- See the full body of work in one place
- Read the artist notes behind each image
- Inquire about availability and editions
Join my free newsletter and I’ll email you when I publish new calotypes and share fresh entries from my artist journal.
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Join Pictorial Whispers Membership for $10/month and help sustain rare, handmade calotype work rooted in grief, memory, and healing.
- You support a slow, 19th-century process with no shortcuts
- You get closer to the story: Resilience, Transformation, and Connection
- You’re part of a quiet movement that values meaning over perfection
Why Windows, Flowers, and 1840s Chemistry
I chose a window, not a landscape, for a reason.
- A window is a threshold: inside and outside, past and future, seen and unseen.
- Flowers and stems are small and vulnerable, like the parts of us that hurt the most.
- The window lets light carve that small shape out of shadow, the same way time carves meaning out of grief.
The 1840s calotype process is central to this work:
- Silver-iodide calotype negatives render colors in a unique way: reds and greens fall to deep shadow; whites and blues lift toward light.
- That restricted palette strips away modern “prettiness” and leaves tone, gesture, and mood.
I work this way because I want the medium itself to carry the weight of time, fragility, and endurance.
The Process – 100% Pure Analog
I follow John Adamson’s 1843 St Andrews-era calotype workflow because it has proven to stand the test of time. The handmade calotypes that Hill and Adamson made in the early 1840s are still with us today and in excellent condition.
Each sheet of paper is first acidified, then iodized with potassium iodide and silver nitrate to form silver iodide, dried, and later sensitized with an aceto-nitrate of silver solution just before exposure. I load this paper in the camera and expose it, then develop the calotype in a dilute gallic acid developer and again in a gallo-nitrate solution to build the final density, before fixing and washing the negative.
Because each calotype is coated and processed by hand, every one is unique.
Annual Volumes
To keep this project grounded and complete, I work in yearly volumes:
Pictorial Whispers: Window Studies – 2026 Vol. I [visit gallery]
- A curated sequence of window studies made throughout the year.
- Each plate is paired with its original story text.
- The book becomes a quiet record of one year of inner life, seen through one window.
Future years will continue the series, one volume at a time. Each volume stands alone, but together they chart a longer journey through loss, resilience, and change.
For Collectors
If you collect this work, you are not just buying an image—you are choosing a fragment of a lived year.
- Editions are kept small to respect the hand-made nature of the process.
- A written story card accompanies each calotype, echoing the text that appears in the book.
These calotypes are made to last, both physically and emotionally. They are meant for quiet spaces where slow looking still matters.
For Analog Large Format Photographers
If you are an analog photographer, this project is also a study in process discipline:
- One window, one core subject, one historic 1840s workflow.
- One whole plate large format camera, one lens (Verito 11 /12″ f/4), and one paper.
- Variation comes from emotion, light, chemistry, and the handmade workflow (aura).
This narrow path lets me go deep into the calotype processes while keeping the work honest and repeatable.
I share more technical notes, chemistry details, and behind-the-scenes thoughts with members of my Darkroom Diary community.
Stay Connected
If this work speaks to you and you’d like to:
- Follow new window studies as they are created
- Learn more about the 1840s calotype and ANS processes
- Be notified when new volumes and print editions are available
Join my Newsletter or Darkroom Diary, where I share new plates, working notes, and the stories that never make it into the final books.
This work is slow, fragile, and made entirely by hand. If it speaks to you, I invite you to become a member and help keep it alive.
Handmade window studies of grief and healing using an 1840s calotype process. Calotype paper negatives—no digital, no AI—created for serious collectors and curators who want to hold real emotion, not pixels.
